Ten tips for less Stress in 2014

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Most of the stress we experience in life is self-inflicted. We can’t do much to change the weather and traffic jams will still be an inevitable part of the daily commute in 2014. We will still have the same twenty-four hours in a day and bills will still need to be paid. However, by making a few small changes to our outlook, combined with some practical tweaks along the way and the stress can be reduced by as much as 50% in some cases.

Tip 1. Get up an hour earlier. No, this isn’t my sadistic suggestion number one! Having a bit of quiet time for you before the family gets up can really allow you to have quiet time for reflection, meditation, a leisurely shower or bath. Starting the day on “slow, gentle and peaceful” setting rather than ” hurried, rushed and late” mode will really make a difference to your outlook for the rest of the day.

Tip 2. Go to bed earlier (combine this with getting up an hour earlier). Before you do, spend just a few minutes “putting the day to rest”. Get a pen and paper (not computer screen and keypad!) and mentally replay the day. Think back and make a note of all the positives, the little successes of the day. It is very easy to focus on the negatives and this is where you do things differently. Instead of dwelling on what went wrong, in 2014 we are going to focus on what went well, give ourselves a pat on the back and really begin to enhance our self esteem. Now finally make a note of what needs to be attended to tomorrow.

Tip 3. Having started the day an hour earlier, you can now allow plenty of time for your daily commute, whether that is to work, school and dropping off the children, the shops or wherever. The important thing is to allow sufficient time to ensure this is an unhurried journey. Hospital or medical appointments can become leisurely affairs with time to enjoy your favourite book, traffic jams can be places to listen to your favourite music or perhaps an audio book or a business podcast.

Tip 4. Slow down and respect others. This means listening to people without rushing to interject, no longer finishing people’s sentences. Instead respect and take time to listen, really listen and then consider your response before jumping in. Try it for an hour and you will see the difference it makes immediately to your stress levels.

Tip 5. Prioritise. At the start of each day write a list with the key things you need to attend to. Accept that there will always be more coming in than going out. You have a finite amount of time to do a finite amount of things.

Tip 6. Accept. There is no such thing as perfection.  No one is perfect, so do not expect perfection from yourself or others. Focusing on perfection takes us away from “inner peace and calm.” Try to be a “good enough” person and accept that the need for perfection is a losing battle that will only leave you feeling frustrated, stressed and dissatisfied.

Tip 7. From January 1st start to say “No.” Be realistic, do not take on everything, don’t be afraid to ask for help. Let 2014 be “the year of the human being,” not the “human doing.” Set yourself realistic goals so that you do not find yourself becoming overwhelmed.

Tip 8. You do not always have to be right. It is ok to give in occasionally. Competing and battling all the time can be a major source of stress. Allow yourself to be flexible and to learn compromise. meeting others halfway.  Of course you will want to stand your ground if your right, but don’t take every opportunity to criticise and put others down.

Tip 9. Get active. Begin in a small way, taking the stairs instead of the lift. Washing your car instead of taking it top a car wash, going for a walk at the weekend with your family. Getting some regular exercise is a powerful way to reduce stress. It is a great tonic for the body as well as the mind.

Tip 10. In direct contrast to tip 9, slow down! Take time to relax, meditate and have time for quiet reflection. At the end of the day before you go home stop somewhere to take in nature, just five minutes will make all the difference. Promise yourself that you will read a book this year (A real one, made of paper, one of those things with pages that you turn by hand!) Take up a hobby and bring some good old fashioned fun back in your life in 2014.

Extra Tip – Find someone to talk to and give you some support while you make the changes you need to de-stress your life – Best wishes for 2014.

Until next time, Steve Clifford, Cognitive Behavioural Psychotherapist.

Image ref: [[File:2014 and fireworks.jpg|thumb|2014 and fireworks]]

Visit us @  www.steveclifford.com                                                                                          Like us @ www.facebook.com/yourmentalhealthmatters                                                      Tweet us @ cbt4you

Are you worried about your weight?


How many people reading this will be conscious of putting on a few extra pounds over the festive period. I know I am. Yet, for some, such self- consciousness is a daily battle and goes far beyond feeling a bit fat.

Often beginning at school, perhaps as a result of teasing or being bullied, preoccupation with body image may take over and become an obsession. In adolescence when girls are most sensitive about their looks and body shape, media images can fuel insecurity, often with pictures depicting models airbrushed to portray an idealised but unrealistic image. Other possible causes includes genetic predisposition and hormonal or chemical imbalances.

For the self-conscious teen,hiding away, indulging in excessive grooming or over reliance on make-up or, constantly looking in mirrors examining every little imperfection can become a daily torture, a nightmare relived over and over again. These days it is not just girls who suffer with BDD but an increasing number of boys are becoming obsessed with perceived defects or flaws in their appearance.

Body Dysmorphic Disorder (BDD) is an anxiety related condition associated with distorted body image. In many ways it is similar to Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) where the compulsion to look in mirrors, check and often pick at the skin can be overwhelming. To the person experiencing it, no matter how much reassurance they may receive, this will afford little comfort. You see, it is a pervasive psychological condition where rather like looking into a fairground mirror, the mind distorts reality. It affects between 0.5% ( OCD-UK) and 1% (NHS Choices) of the population.

BDD is a serious condition and can lead to depression and even suicide. It is common in those who suffer with anxiety, in particular those with a history of OCD, social phobia. It frequently exists alongside eating disorders such as anorexia and bulimia.

What signs might indicate that BDD may be a problem?

  • Becoming pre-occupied with looking at others, comparing yourself to others.
  • Having feelings of disgust or revulsion about your body.
  • Seeing yourself as abnormal, odd or different.
  • Feeling that others are judging you (and your body) in a negative way.
  • Avoiding or obsessing over mirrors, constantly checking your appearance.
  • Using make up, clothing or hair to hide supposed defects, imperfections or flaws.
  • Becoming overwhelmed or upset over your appearance (commonly focusing on facial features such as the nose or perhaps complexion).
  • Feeling uncomfortable and anxious when in company.
  • Becoming secretive and not wanting to seek help.
  • Contemplating plastic surgery to correct perceived bodily defects.
  • Obsessing over food, diet and exercise.

What help is available?

The start point with regard to getting help should ideally be your family doctor. It is likely that they will recommend Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, a form of talking therapy that focuses on the way our perception affects our thoughts, emotions and behaviours. This type of therapy has proved to be very effective with BDD and is recognised by the National Institute for Clinical Excellence (NICE). Medication may also be extremely helpful, in particular SSRI antidepressants. Sometimes there also may be a role for antipsychotic medication.

The key thing is to recognise that you have a problem and that you need help

Until next time, Steve Clifford, Cognitive Behavioural Psychotherapist.

visit us @  www.steveclifford.com                                                                                            Like us @ www.facebook.com/yourmentalhealthmatters                                                        Tweet us @ cbt4you

For more information see :

AnxietyUK – http://www.anxietyuk.org.uk                                                                                  MIND – http://www.mind.org.uk                                                                                                NHS choices – http://www.nhs.uk                                                                                    Patient.co.uk – http://www.patient.co.uk                                                                                  OCD-UK – http://www.ocduk.org                                                                                              Kidshealth.org – http://kidshealth.org

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Should I see a therapist?

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Well, that really depends on why you want to see a therapist. If you are going to see them with the hope that they will solve your problems, then perhaps not. If, however, you are going to them with the hope that they will help you to solve your problems, then that’s another matter. You see, the job of a therapist is not to “fix,” but instead to help you to mobilise your resources. A good therapist does not solve your problems, but helps you to develop the capacity to solve your own problems.

People often look to have therapy when they have a major life crisis, such as a death, the end of a relationship or the loss of a job. Sometimes people feel empty or inadequate inside, or they may feel that life is not going right and they may feel unfulfilled.

It can take courage to go and see a therapist, after all, firstly the person has to admit they have needs and then they have to face them. Fear of facing painful feelings can prevent people seeking help and many turn to work, alcohol or other coping strategies to push thoughts and feelings out of their consciousness. Therapy does require a commitment from you, but it is worthwhile and talking about difficult emotions in a safe space can be very liberating. Expressing your thoughts and feelings in such a way as to clarify your own situation, come to terms with painful emotions and see your difficulties with greater objectivity can really be helpful.

It is the therapist job to provide you with a space where you can talk without fear of judgement. In other words, a confidential place where you can feel held, secure and safe. For many, the therapy room is a refuge, a sanctuary. I like to think of it as your room, your space within my world. A place where you can return to at any time in your life should you need.

A good therapist will make you feel at ease, they may even feel more like a friend than a professional therapist, someone with whom you may feel you can tell anything. Whilst friendship and friendliness may be an important ingredient, along with warmth, genuineness and congruence they can never be a friend as such. You are seeking their help as a professional not as a chum, buddy, lover or any other relationship.  It is precisely because of the uniqueness of this relationship where warmth and friendship in the therapy space combined with professional integrity come together in the service of your difficulties. Next time you are telling a friend something notice how they will often come back and try to tell you a worse story, or perhaps they will tell you what to do or simply rubbish what you say. A good therapist won’t do this. Of course, there may be a value in the therapist sharing or disclosing something of themselves, they will only do so really if it is deemed to be helpful and supports the therapeutic endeavour. You can be sure of one thing though, unlike a friend or acquaintance, a good therapist won’t dump their garbage on your shoulders!

The term psychotherapist is one that I really like. Not because it is a lovely grandiose title… but because of the original Greek meaning of the word. Here the word therapist literally means “attendant” and the word psyche literally means “spirit” or “soul.” So a psychotherapist is literally a “Soul Attendant.”

One of the problems when deciding that you want to take up therapy is to find the right type of therapy for you. The problem is that there are just so many different types of therapy to choose from. Therapies vary from analytical laying on the couch type therapy, to body therapy, cognitive behavioural, transpersonal to neurolinguistic programming. The list is seemingly endless. I suggest you go to a good bookshop and look for books on therapy in the psychology section, alternatively contact a few therapists and ask them to tell you more about their particular approach.

Probably the best way to find a therapist is through personal recommendation. This may be from your doctor or a friend. The key thing is that the therapists approach has to feel right for you.

These days a lot is spoken about a type of therapy know as cognitive behavioural therapy or CBT, which is my own speciality. This is an action-oriented as well as word-oriented therapy. It helps people understand what is happening and what they can do to change the way they feel and react. CBT looks at the way thoughts (cognitions) and beliefs affect our emotions and the meaning we give to events. This affects our emotions and our reactions (behaviours). Unlike some other approaches, CBT is a relatively short term psychotherapeutic approach. The length of therapy tends to depend on the complexity of the presenting problem. A block of sessions ( usually six) may often be enough for a noticeable difference to emerge. Improvement to “quality of life” is often the best measure of success. The goal of CBT could be said, to enable the client to learn ways to address problems and difficulties in order to become their own therapist.

If somebody asked me what do you do? I would reply that I do many things, but one of the most important things is”tilting the mirror.” In other words. Reflecting back in such a way as enable the client to glimpse a slightly different perspective. Helping the client gain insight and understanding. This may be helping the client to see how unhelpful thinking traits, such as catastrophizing mind reading, black and white thinking distort their view of reality. We may look at the meaning they give to events creates a huge emotional upheaval and how stepping back and distancing can help. Then together we look at the problem area and the way it impacts on the person’s life. We consider how life would be different if the problem was resolved. We look at what may need to happen or change, then we look at the emotions arising out of the event or situation and talk about them. Together we identify what needs to happen to bring about resolution of the problem area. Then we identify strategies and goals (or aspirations) to aim for. Working within a specific time frame, using measures and behavioural experiments to help us. Through the course of therapy the client and therapist walk “shoulder to shoulder,” addressing the difficulties In a collaborative way.

Some people say, “I felt worse after my first session,” for others, getting it out in the open can be a great relief. Problems rarely resolve themselves without action, and if they do so, it may not be in the way we desire. Having the opportunity to explore them with another person may help a great deal.

Don’t expect miracles, but don’t dismiss the possibility that resolution of difficulties can feel like a miracle. Therapists are not “miracle workers” and if they present themselves that way, don’t go anywhere near them! The therapist is there to guide you to achieve your goals, not to do the work for you or “make” you feel better. Every session you attend is one step closer to feeling better.

Until next time, Steve Clifford, Cognitive Behavioural Psychotherapist.

visit us @ www.stevecliffordcbt.com
Like us @ www.facebook.com/yourmentalhealthmatters                                                        tweet @ cbt4you

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Take “time out” today.



As I write this, it is quiet here, peaceful you could say. It is 6am and my scruffy dog Merlin lies curled up, resting, having had a run along the beach chasing seagulls. This is my favourite time of the day, the time of the day before the world really gets going. Time for me to sit and contemplate, time to meditate or write, before the phone starts ringing and before I feel obliged to check the emails.

You see, I have started getting up earlier these days when I realised the benefits in terms of managing stress. Having this time out just for myself is bliss, it is an opportunity to charge up the batteries and prepare myself for the inevitable demands of my day. Walking in solitude, looking up at the sky and watching the new morning break is very calming and life affirming. It really helps get things in perspective.

Having spent the best part of thirty years working in psychological health leads me to realise that one of the primary underlying causes of stress and mental breakdown is lack of “time out.” Yes, I realise that not everyone has a beach, wood or even a dog to take for a walk. Not everybody would want to anyway! However, that said, taking a few minutes to lock the bathroom door and have a quiet soak in some fragrant oils, taking time to meditate or sitting with a cup of tea looking out of the window at the world beyond, can have the same beneficial effect.

Setting aside some quiet time for you, just a few minutes alone before the hustle and bustle of the day begins can really make a difference. Allowing yourself, giving yourself permission to have some “you time” for peaceful contemplation is one small change that you could make that might just change your life!

Along with this change, I would recommend stopping in the middle of the day to do the same, perhaps sitting in a park or other leafy place, perhaps feeding the ducks or pigeons. Failing that, even sitting in a shopping mall taking time to focus on the movement of your breathing can have the same effect, that of mentally quietening your mind, rejuvenating and calming the body.

For a long time I have recommended to those who work in stressful and demanding jobs, that, before they come home they park up near some trees or by a field or hedge and listen to the birds for a few minutes. This serves as a natural “decompression tank,” affording similar benefits to “time out” in the morning. You see, the meeting of two worlds on getting home can, itself be stressful.

From today, take some “time out”,  if you can.

Until next time, Steve Clifford, Cognitive Behavioral Psychotherapist.

visit us: www.stevecliffordcbt.com                                                                                          like us @ www.facebook.com/yourmentalhealthmatters                                                        tweet us @ cbt4you

Main ref: “Don’t sweat the small stuff…and its all small stuff” by Richard Carlson

Nelson Mandela, 1918-2013.

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No words can adequately express the sadness at news of the death of this great man. An enormous loss to the people of South Africa and to the world. A revolutionary, a political prisoner and later a President, he was someone who worked tirelessly to dismantle apartheid and end racial discrimination. Described by UN General secretary Ban Ki-Moon as ” a giant for justice and down to earth human inspiration” whose “selfless struggle for human dignity, equality and freedom” influenced many around the world (1).

His great strength along with his humility, his humanity and his enduring compassion will never be forgotten. Like many before him, Ghandi, Mother Teresa, Martin Luther King, his legacy as a champion who believed passionately in standing up for those who suffered and who never gave up, should be an inspiration to us all.
President Jacob Zuma spoke of his greatness and said, ” What made Nelson Mandela great was precisely what made him human. We saw in him what we seek in ourselves. And in him, we saw so much of ourselves (3).

Great change has come about as a result of his legacy and while apartheid may have ended in South Africa and segregation is no longer a facet of American society, racism is still a problem around the world. According to chat show host Oprah Winfrey, generations have been “marinated” in racism and the only way for it to end is for generations of racists to die out (2).

Could the same be true of mental illness? There are many in our society equally “marinated” in bigotry and ignorance when it comes to mental ill health. The Mental Health Foundation (6) tells us that “society in general has stereotyped views about mental illness and how it affects people. Many people believe that people with mentally ill health are violent and dangerous, when in fact they are more at risk of being attacked or harming themselves than other people.”

Stigma and discrimination towards those with mental health problems can really impact on those in need of help. It can have a major impact on the condition itself, with many reluctant to come forward and seek treatment. Many delay getting help with the consequence that their condition worsens. According to Dr Drew Pinsky, Psychiatrist, the venomous effects of stigma lead to death for many who suffer from a mental illness (4) with suicide a sad reality.

In my experience many people are hesitant to seek treatment because of the implications of saying they are mentally unwell because of the shame and wrongly perceived notion that mental illness is a sign of weakness. Who can blame them? If you were completing a job application would you put down that you suffer with schizophrenia, bipolar illness, depression or drug addiction? In the workplace, despite improving economic conditions, it is still an employer’s market where they can select the “best” candidates and “weed out” the “weaker” applicants.

In the UK it was only in January this year that people with mental health problems were allowed to be (5) company directors, serve on juries or become MPs. This is an absurd reality. The Mental Health Foundation tells us that “people with mental health problems are amongst the least likely of any group with a long-term health condition or disability to find work, be in a steady, long-term relationship, live in decent housing and be socially included in mainstream society”(6).

What can we do about it? Well, take a leaf out of Nelson Mandela’s book and work tirelessly to end discrimination. We need to talk about mental illness and take every opportunity to speak out. It is important that we correct inflammatory portrayals where mental ill health is presumed to be linked to violence and where people with mental illness are betrayed as criminal or evil. We must correct inaccurate stereotyping where those with mental illness are regarded as very disabled and unable to live normal, fulfilled lives. We need to embrace those among us who need our help and support, stop using negative stigmatising words such as crazy, mad, retarded, loony, etc.

Furthermore, we need to consider whether there is a better alternative to “mental health centres,” which in themselves serve to reinforce the notion that mental illness is different to other kinds of  illness. People with mental health problems should be accessing help within mainstream healthcare. We need to be bringing health education into schools and it should be an integral part of the curriculum, not simply a “bolt-on.” Teachers and others in a position to educate should be very familiar with mental health conditions and able break down misconceptions as well as identifying signs of mental ill health early on, so that young people can get the help they need…

I could go on, but will stop at this point. I suppose the most important message to get across is that we all need to care.

Until next time, Steve Clifford, Cognitive Behavioural Psychotherapist.

Like us @ www.facebook.com/yourmentalhealthmatters
Tweet us @ cbt4you

Image ref: http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File%3ANelson_Mandela-2008_(edit).jpg

Main references:

1. “South Africa’s Nelson Mandela dies in Johannesburg,” BBC News, 6 December 2013. www.bbc.co.uk /news/world-Africa-25249520 [Accessed 06/12/13].

2. “World mourns Mandela, South Africa’s ‘Father,” 4News, 6 December 2013, www.channel4.com/news/Nelson-Mandela-dies-dead-madiba-south-Africa-president [Accessed 06/12/13].

3. “Oprah:Generations ‘marinated’ in racism will need to die out for discrimination to end across the world,” Mail Online, 6 December 2013, www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2508646/Oprah-Winfrey-says-racist-generations-need-die-end-discrimination.html

4. “On Mental Illness: CNN’s Doctor Drew Reports on Stigma,” The Berkeley Daily Planet, 8 March 2013,www.berkeleydailyplanet.com/issue/2013-03-08/article/40844.9 [Accessed 06/12/13].

5. “Today the Lords approved the Mental Health Discrimination Bill,” Rosier. D. SLaM Twig:Operations, 18 January 2013.slamtwigops.wordpress.com/tag/rethink-mental-illness/ [Accessed 06/12/13].

6. “Stigma and Discrimination,” Mental Health A-Z, Mental Health Foundation. www.mentalhealth.org.uk/help-information/mental-health-a-z/S/stigma-discrimination/

Ten tips for a more peaceful life

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Is your life spent dashing around, endlessly playing catch up, rushing and doing one thing after the other? Is the daily task list an endless one? Do you find yourself hurrying to finish one task while contemplating the next? Is your time spent taking phone calls, checking emails and organizing others? Is lunch a quick bite on the go and the home run punctuated with a stop off at the supermarket to grab some groceries? Finally, do you crack open that bottle of wine or can of lager pretty much as soon as you get indoors, in order to bring yourself down from 40,000 feet to 20,000 feet? If so, join the club, you and millions like you, are on this relentless treadmill, ticking off the days until the weekend only to start again like Sisyphus first thing Monday morning.

What kind of a life is this? Is this really what living is all about?

How does a life of peaceful simplicity sound? A life where you can really enjoy every activity and where you can feel a state of contentment in all you do. How is such a life possible I hear you say. Well, let me tell you how.

In essence, it entails a change in your attitude.

It doesn’t mean giving up all the things that you love. Just taking the time to make a few small changes can really enhance your quality of life. This in turn can really benefit both your physical and mental well- being. Don’t wait until you are at your final destination before you make such changes.

Here are ten suggestions to start you on your way. See this as the “long game,” where, little by little, you will be letting go of stress and replacing it with peace and contentment.

1. Decide what is really important to you. The things that are really important in your life. Consider what it is you want to achieve, how you want to spend your time, who do you want to spend your time with, what do you want to accomplish at work. Make a short list, say, 4-5 things you want to achieve (forget the 50 item bucket list!), 4-5 people important to you, that you want to spend your life with, 4-5 things you want to accomplish at work, etc…

2. Look at all the things you commit yourself to. You can’t possibly do everything that you have committed to doing. If you’re reading this, it is probably because your life is way too full in any case. Once you accept that you can’t do everything
then you have started to make change. They say, ” If you want something done, ask a busy person.” Don’t let this person be you.

3. Start by letting go of some things. Is there anything you can leave off your to do list? Anything you do out of “duty” perhaps that you can let go of. Anything you don’t like that you can pass over to another, or at least another day. If your daily list consists of 8 items, try cutting it to six and ultimately aim for 4. Failing to complete items on a daily list frequently leads to a sense of frustration. Do less, succeed more.

4. Space things out. Leave gaps in between tasks, that way if things take longer you don’t end up feeling rushed and stressed out. Instead, your aim should be to adopt a more leisurely pace. I recall my accountant suggesting I put my fees up just a little. What this meant was that I did not need to see so many people, thus I was less rushed, had more energy for those clients I saw, and the quality of my therapy improved.

5. Slow down and do things mindfully. Whatever you are doing, whether it is taking a shower or preparing a cup of tea. Take time to perform each action deliberately with thought, instead of going through the motions like you were on automatic pilot.

6. Forget about multitasking, it is so passé anyway. Do just one thing at a time and do it well. It is impossible to multi-task anyway. People may think they are, but they are not. What they are actually doing is one thing then the next in rapid succession, paying attention to one thing and then the other. To prove my point look at both the black and the white image below at exactly the same time. You will see that your attention shifts first one way and then the other, and then back again.

File:Ley figura fondo.gif

7. Create time each day for solitude. It is all very well slowing down, enjoying the tasks we do, doing less of them but you really need time for yourself. I get up an hour earlier than my family and this gives me quite time for quiet contemplation, writing, checking mail and planning my day.  Sometimes I suggest people stop the car by some trees on the way home from work, taking 10 minutes just to listen to the birds and take in nature. I like to think this serve as a “de-compression chamber” in between work and home.

8. Incorporate mindful breathing into your day. Use a cue, such as the chiming of a church bell, sound of an emergency vehicle siren in the distance, someone coughing or walking by with a drink of coffee to remind you to practice being present and focus on your breathing for a minute.

9. De-clutter your world. Look at everything around your workstation or place you reside in. Is there anything that can go? We often get used to things and keep them long after their “sell by date.” People often hate throwing things away, whether it is that old cardigan with the holes in or ornaments gathering dust on the mantelpiece.

10. Finally, look across your life at all the things that are a source of stress. Start eliminating them now. This should be a “work in progress,” an ongoing commitment to change. I started “de-stressing” my life twenty years ago by starting my working day an hour later. What this meant was that each morning I took my little dog for a walk in the woods before I left for the office. It gave us some quality time with nature before venturing into the hustle and bustle of daily life. My commute both to and from work was less stressful as I now missed the rush hour. Checking emails twice only, morning and end of day, leaving my phone on voicemail, simple things but things that gave me a sense of control and order. Above all, simple stress reducers.

Good luck with your aspirations to make your life more peaceful. If you have any tips you wish to share please comment or email.

Until next time, Steve Clifford, Cognitive Behavioural Psychotherapist.

Visit our health blog – www.stevecliffordcbt.com                                                  Like us @ www.facebook.com/yourmentalhealthmatters                                      Tweet us @ cbt4you

Image refs:                                                                                                                  http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File%3ALey_figura_fondo.gif                   http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File%3APagan_meditation2.jpg

Main ref: Thich Nhat Hanh – “Peaceful Simplicity: How to live a life of Contentment.” Zen habits.net [Accessed 21/02/12]